This one being me.
Yes, I’m still here, amidst the chaos of election week in the United States, and rising COVID cases in my area. It’s been quite a few challenging months (as it has for probably everyone reading this), which is why I gave myself permission to procrastinate as much as possible. Hence, no newsletter or social media updates. I hope you missed me!
But that’s not really the entire truth.
The truth is that I have a fear of starting. I’m terrified of doing Honestrox on a full-time basis. Because what happens when you’re on your way to starting something? You create the possibility of failure. Take away the “starting point”, and you eliminate the “failure point”.
Seems logical, no?
To give you a quick update and summary on what’s been happening in the past 4 months:
- Gave birth
- Moved from Amsterdam to France for one month
- Moved back to Amsterdam for a week
- Officially moved back to Florida
- Endured the most brutal jetlag (think 4 am breakfasts)
- Finished my Master’s Thesis on Job Motivation (how effing ironic is this?)
- I told myself that once everything settles down and my thesis is done, I’m going to sit my ass down and focus 100% on Honestrox.
This was supposed to have happened this past Monday as I’ve submitted my thesis (whoop whoop!).
But instead, this is what I’ve done this week:
- Napped 3 hours every morning
- Did some yoga
- Shopped on Amazon
- Spent a gazillion hours glued to the TV watching the election unfold
- Anything to avoid facing my own goals and dreams.
Why do we have this fear of starting something WE WANT!?
If you have Social Anxiety, you know how hard it is to make the first move, to speak up, to voice your opinion, to ask a question, to make yourself seen and heard (the list goes on). Because you know that once you do, you might face the most uncomfortable feelings. But you can also feel the most courageous ones.
It just so happens that you’re more likely to focus on the negative outcome, rather than the positive one.
And if you’re like me, you need some kind of external boost to get you going.
For me, this came in the form of a quote that I fell upon (while scrolling endlessly on social media this week). It’s because of this quote that I’m here, writing again to you.
Because sometimes, all it takes is one little push to get started.
I hope to be that push for you.
And if not, maybe this will help you as much as it did for me.